Inviting Employees into the Developmental Dance
Fear of conflict often holds us back. It can hold our employees back, too, when it keeps us from stepping into difficult conversations about performance expectations.
Conversations where we talk openly about how they might not be showing up as we need them to. Conversations when quality has slipped – or has never really been there at all. Conversations about what changes they need to make to more fully step into their job. And sometimes, the part we fear the most is listening to their responses about what they may need from us.
What I hear from many entrepreneurs is that these conversations are challenging.
Challenging in a way that most would rather avoid them.
Instead of stepping courageously into these opportunities that hold the possibility of aligning employees and strengthening our businesses, many of us bury our heads. We hold onto underperforming employees for way too long, suffering their poor performance, and then finally come to our breaking point and cut them loose.
This does a disservice to us and our business, of course, as poor performance drags on our quality, our margins and, sometimes, our sanity. It’s also a big disservice to the employee who may not be aware they have a performance issue in the first place.
And that’s an issue.
Employees rarely come to us fully formed into exactly what we need for our organizations, when we need it. And as businesses grow and markets shift, well… needs change. We owe it to employees who hitch their career to us to be open and clear about our expectations and invite them into the developmental dance. While we can’t make the changes for them, it’s a real gift to shine a focused light on the areas that will support their personal growth. I’m grateful for those who do this for me and, sometimes, that is just the nudge we need.
Committing to these kinds of courageous conversations may mean learning to manage our own fears around conflict, around awkwardly stepping into messy situations, and around potentially exposing ourselves to our employee’s hurt feelings. Yet by offering this type of caring and direct feedback we give employees a chance to redeem themselves, to become more aware of their growth edges, and to make the meaningful changes they need to become better leaders.
What is your belief around conflict that has the potential to choke you in fear when setting expectations with employees?
